When I Die


In the past two weeks, three good friends have lost a parent; two of them lost both parents during 2012.  It is a time of sadness and grief, but also the joy that the departed are transitioning into their next life. 

A good friend shared a poem read at the funeral of Wendy Kanter in 2007. Wendy was the wife of Rabbi Kanter, formerly of Congregation Micah in Nashville. It is a beautiful tribute to our loved ones who have gone before us and are preparing the way for us.  I pray my friends are comforted by these words.

Will you share this poem with your friends who have lost someone dear and are remembering them during the holidays?


When I Die 

When I die

If you need to weep

cry for someone

walking the street beside you.

And when you need me

put your arms around others,

and give them what you need to give me.

You can love me most by letting

hands touch hands, and

souls touch souls.

You can love me most by sharing your simchas and

multiplying your mitzvot.

You can love me most by letting me live in your

deeds and not on your mind.

And when you say Kaddish for me

Remember what our Torah teaches:

Love doesn’t die

People do.

So when all that’s left of me is love

Give me away.

            -Author unknown, adapted from Tikunay Nefashot-Spiritual Renewal; ed.

                                                                  Rabbis Allen Maller and Jeffrey Marx

*simchas- joy

**mitzvot- doing a good deed; comforting someone

***Kaddish- a prayer in the rituals of mourning

Blessings, my friend,


When I Die- (click here for MP3 file)