In my career, I had lots of training in management and leadership and ‘how to be a good boss’. There were some variations, but the core element of all the training programs was that in order to be a good boss, you had to be a good listener. I hope that I got better at this over time, but I had to constantly remind myself that I didn’t know everything and I certainly didn’t know how another person was feeling (or struggling) unless I was willing to stop talking and just listen.

The internet has allowed us to “push” our opinion on others, often in a confrontational way making snap decisions about stereotypes and offering comments intended to incite anger. I am in awe that many of these posts are from Christian friends who would rather offer unsolicited opinions without even thinking of asking about my thoughts first.

One of my favorite stories from the Bible is of the woman at the well in John 4:4-42. Despite culture, gender, racial and moral differences, Jesus lovingly interacted with her both listening and talking. And what happened? She became one of his strongest advocates, (vs. 39) “Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony…” 

In biblical times, the Samaritans were hated by the Jews. That mindset pretty much sums up the relationship between Jews and Samaritans. The Jews considered the Samaritans as outsiders and “impure.” They couldn’t even agree on what books were included in the “Old Testament” with the Samaritans rejecting the prophets and poetry but believing in a different version of the Book of Joshua. But even with all the differences, Jesus is willing to talk with the Samaritan woman, alone, and treats her respectfully, not calling her names and trying to demean her, even though she is a sinner (like us!). Why is this interaction so unusual?

I read this on a blog, “When it comes to enemies, we don’t think twice; our response is emotional and reflexive. If it comes from them, we’re against it. Whatever it is they’re saying, it’s wrong. Whatever they want is bad. Whatever they’re doing must be stopped.”

Doesn’t that pretty much up today’s political climate and the temperature we exhibit on Facebook, Twitter and other social media platforms?

I read this on another blog, “We carry this attitude forward to our nation’s formal opponents as well as to rivals at work, political adversaries, neighbors who bug us, and family members who press our buttons. Nothing these people are up to can be good. It would help if they would just disappear.”

Back to my original question, “Was Jesus a Good Listener?”

I don’t see anything in my Bible where Jesus demeaned anyone, interrupted them before they could finish speaking, or called them a “communist” in the vernacular of the day when Christianity came into being. That wasn’t his style as a teacher. It was important for him to understand what his hearers were thinking so that he could “meet them where they were”. And he never “forced” anyone to believe His words; he “invited them” and was gracious in his welcoming arms. Jesus often asked people questions, a sign of someone truly listening. Jesus obviously knew their answers but listened due to the effect it had on the person not just for His own benefit.

I believe that first, Jesus was a good listener. I want to be more like Jesus, so I want to continue to remember to listen first; talk and write less.

Blessings, my friend,
Agatha